


Texts From Undisclosed

by DustToDust



Category: John Dies at the End - David Wong
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-06-02
Updated: 2014-06-02
Packaged: 2018-02-03 03:54:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 244
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1730183
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DustToDust/pseuds/DustToDust
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Drabbles inspired by the Texts From Last Night website. Of which John probably thinks of as a series of challenges.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Texts From Undisclosed

**Author's Note:**

> Because there's too many good texts that just don't fit one fandom. And I want to write them all.

(310): My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.

~

"Did you find them?"

"Your house?" I asked as my head tried to split itself open under the angry pounding of the midget mime trapped inside it. 

"No," John snorted, because obviously that was not the important issue. "The nukes! Do you know how awesome those would be?"

"John," I stopped walking and the mime midget paused for a smoke break. "I'm getting married in four hours, have zero idea what happened last night, I woke up to a weird midget mime beating me on the face with a rotting chicken, am walking through some kind of weird hell dimension, and you want to know if I figured out where to buy nukes from?"

"Yes," John said without hesitation. " _Priorities_ Dave!"

"Ok. Just come get me, John," I started walking again. Comforted by the fact I actually was talking to the real John. Nothing we've encountered yet has been able to perfectly replicate his Johnness. "The color yellow doesn't exist here and it's giving me a headache. Also, I might be in the middle of being possessed."

"Sure, I'll get Amy and we'll come find you," John hung up before I could protest. Some vague thought about bad luck seeing the bride rolling around my mind, but the mime started it's beating routine again and I lost the thought.


End file.
